Jump to content

Recommended Posts

Totally agree with you about choosing toy guns over a child being mean to animals...and I get having mixed feelings about daycare kids playing with guns. Unfortunately in our society it seems inevitable that boys will, like you said, go to great lengths to make a gun so how can you not just let them play and hope that talking about it will prevent future misuse of said gun? 

Thank you for being brave and open enough to share with me about the rape, and while it never ever should have happened to you, I appreciate your belief that it brought you awareness and led you to be a better person. I firmly agree. Every struggle we go through brings us wisdom and builds resiliency. I have been through the same experience, and it has definitely shaped my character and influenced how I live my life. Granted, in some very unhealthy ways at first, but ultimately in positive ways. I consider it karma, or curriculum from my angels.  One thing I like about myself is my compassion for others, desire to help others, and genuine belief that at heart all human beings are good despite the harm that one can do to another. I have been hurt by many (men) but believe that a combination of biological predisposition and environmental factors, including early trauma, societal programming, racism. poverty, inequality, etc. can combine and create a perfect storm where one's behavior strays from the norm. For example, a teenager starts drinking and using drugs to cope with unmanageable feelings related to living in a dysfunctional family. This teen has a father who is an addict, so he/she's already loaded to be an addict. At first the drinking serves a purpose and is adaptive- he/she feels better with a buzz and has a whole new group of friends and a place to hang out after school and on weekends instead of being at home with the family. Soon, the drinking/drugging takes over, and the behavior is such that friends don't want to hang out with him/her, and parents are even more angry at home so home is not an option. Teenager then gets desperate, is using more, loses job- needs money, steals from someone, gets caught, happens to be black so unreasonable consequences from court, loses hope, gives up, continues to use, no intervention so begins dealing to support habit, arrested again....

I have no idea why I just went on like that.. forgive me. I think I must be trying to rationalize or justify or some crazy stuff...I digress

Love that you read with your daughter. Something I would have loved to have done with my mom. Is she still in school? If not, what is she doing?  Yes, good books I read more than once. I want to donate my books to women's prisons. That's a story for another time. 

Hear you about difficulty feeling good about our existence- maybe that's where I was going. There are a lot of universal lessons that humans simply haven't allowed ourselves to learn. It is disappointing but I have hope. This movement since George Floyd was murdered gives me hope. Not that his death should have needed to occur to create the movement. 

Actually I"m in Minnesota...land of 10,000 lakes but I've never gone fishing and I do not swim in lakes.

Thank you, it was a peaceful Sunday, I hope it was for you as well. 

Share this post

Link to post
Share on other sites

It is a poser indeed. My brother had soldiers and yet never wanted to fight in Viet Nam although I don't think it was because of ethics to be honest.

I am very good a going off on tangents so I understand. It took many years to realize how it affected me in a positive way  but it did so while it was not the best way to get there I did arrive even though I was still a mess. Weird. I am not totally surprised you have been hurt by many men as you talk about their taking so much power and you are a much better person than I in your basic belief in people. I actually do not dislike people as individuals although I confess to being critical at times on behalf of the planet and animals. It always comes down to them in the end. I sign far too many petitions and have seen horrid things online and so I am angry at the double standards for humans and nonhuman animals-we are all animals really. See, I digress too. I hear what you say about the drugs and teens and as always it comes down to the nature/nurture thing. I always say we come out with our personalities and that can determine who we are but also there is the influence of parents or guardians. Two people can grow up in the exact same bad situation and one will come out ahead and the other might not. There are so many factors involved.

I did love doing that and it is funny because my mother said I did not like reading but I did read. I never read with her as you did not with yours. Rachel is 33 and lives in NYC. She is in the theater doing props. I used to call her a cool nerd. Right now she is sewing hospital gowns because of course the theaters are closed. She went to the demonstrations for George Floyd and I was quite happy she did. I was not sure if she would. Sometime you can tell me about the women's prison thing.

As you know by now I am not a fan of our species although I am quite amicable but I abhor abuse of power, bigotry, and Donald Trump. Of course you do not think his George Floyd's murder should have happened but I agree that it has sparked a worldwide reaction which I hope brings about dramatic and long lasting changes. 

I would guess there are other things to do in MN. Are you not near a lake or do you just not swim? I did laugh at that though. I would not fish either and I have a pond down the road. Fishing is not really a vegan thing but I have thought how nice it would be to sit in a boat or under a tree and pretend.

It is time for bed for me. IT was a weird Sunday and then I tried to do a task I thought would be easy and was not and so I have to go to the store tomorrow to get something to do it. Fortunately I did not try to kill the refrigerator which was the appliance in need although I wanted to. It was all my lack of preparation  beforehand and looking at how to do it. It seemed so easy. It wasn't. I did do a bit of a mediation later and listed to Tara Brach which was calming. 

Share this post

Link to post
Share on other sites

What about your brother? Would you have wanted him to fight? I have so many feelings about war and our county...don't get me started.

There are a lot of things to abhor about out society today. One of them being the the double standards with which humans are treated versus animals and the earth. There's a really interesting book called The Denial of Death by Ernest Becker, who says that humans are neurotic because we are basically "gods who shit." We can't come to terms with the fact that we are essentially animals yet we have consciousness so think we are so much better. With that comes our awareness of our mortality, which he suggests creates all kinds of anxiety and psychological disorders due to our fear of death. Fascinating read- highly recommend it, but it's very dense and you can get caught up in one page for days trying to figure it out. I love delving into a deep subject that challenges conventional thinking. 

I try to avoid watching disturbing material online, at some point in my career I became sensitized to seeing truama since I witnessed it daily at work.. I do read articles and books- which are plenty disturbing, but I can't tolerate actual pictures. 

I'm with you- can't stand the same things about our society. I try to be hopeful and do my part. 

Yes, I'll tell you all about jail...

Minnesota is actually pretty cool. Not too terribly diverse but a lot of big corporations and cool vibe downtown. Liberal feel (for the most part), people generally feel welcome here. Great arts/culture scene. People move here thinking "how the hell am I gonna get through the cold!" but end up staying because of the excellent school system, extensive park offerings, opportunities, and arts and culture scene. I've been here all my life so hard to imagine living elsewhere.  Regarding swimming, I do swim but only in a nice, fairly empty, very clean pool. I was always afraid  of the ocean too, but I went on my first cruise and have to admit that is one fine vacation. However, don't know if those cruises will ever get back up and running😋

Tell me about Vermont. I've traveled extensively but never made it to Vermont. What do you do for fun? 

Share this post

Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi Jo,

No, it is not that I wanted him to fight but more about the privilege of not having to fight because he had more advantages and I really do not condemn him for it. War is indeed a tricky thing and again we could come back to men/people in their need to control and have power and domination. 

I often rant about the double standards of humans and other animals. A dog barks and is killed and people do far worse and sometimes get almost nothing and someone does something to animals they are rarely given an adequate punishment. And now don't you get me started. there are killing contests, the refuges may be opened thanks to the piece of dreck in the WH-I could go on yet it is wildlife who are dangerous. There is not enough room here for my anger. I do not look at the horrid stuff either but in the petitions I sign I see what is done and there are pictures on them. 

"Gods who shit"-i like that. I know just what he is saying. We are considered the sacred species but I always say that humans are not special or the most important species but merely the one with the power-power that is too often abused. People like to think of animals as being unfeeling  and lesser beings because that way they can feel superior. How much time do you have??? Your work would be very emotionally tiring and you would have to become sensitized I would think if you were to be effective.

I am sure that MN is beautiful despite the ugliness  that is going on now. I used to occasionally see years ago some people from Russia. It was cold and I said 'you must be used to this' and they said that actually the hardest winter they ever had was in MN. Are you in a city?

Vermont is progressive, friendly, and very green in many ways. There are a lot of dirt roads that unless you are prepared you might not want to be on in the spring, aka mud season. Trust me-I know from experience. It is very beautiful and there are a lot of very cool things here. I am not sure if I want to stay or go though. I live outside Brattleboro which is a , very very small city. 

Share this post

Link to post
Share on other sites

Good morning Faune,

I hear you about your brother..makes sense, and I know you wouldn't have wanted him to fight. It's interesting to think about how many wars might have been avoided had women been in power. Interestingly, Einstein was interested in the dilemma of war and corresponded with Freud about how to solve the human problem. Einstein said in a letter to Freud, "is it possible to control man's mental evolution so as to make him proof against the psychosis of hate and destructiveness?" Freud responded in a letter, "conflicts between man and man are resolved, in principle, by the recourse to violence...it well may lead to the extinction of mankind...we may rest on the assurance that whatever makes for cultural development is working also against war."  (Freud did have some good ideas)

Ranting about double standards regarding human and animal treatment is fully justified as far as I'm concerned. Animals definitely have feelings. One of my favorite animals is elephants. They are so sweet and gentle. And they take such good care of each other. It's awful what happens to them. I appreciate that you're an activist.Thank you- I think you're right that being sensitized makes me more effective at my work. I appreciate that you're an activist. 

That line is great, right? Humans are all about feeling superior- and aren't able to get over the fact that we are animals, and we don't live forever. 

It's funny- in MN we get acclimated to the weather very quickly. In the spring when it's 40 degrees you'll see people in shorts. And in the winter 20 degrees sometimes feels good after a string of below 0 days. Studies have been done though that show that Minnesotans live long lives, and a theory exists that it's because of the cold weather- perhaps it 'preserves' us? I actually don't mind the cold. My in-laws live in FL and the humidity is something that I have trouble with. I'm such a homebody- lived here my whole life and went to school here. My older sister took of to CA when she was 20 (I was 19 and pissed as hell because we were like best friends- still haven't completely forgiven her!)  But the rest of my family (dysfunctional as they are) live here. 

Vermont sounds lovely. Maybe you should consider MN?

Share this post

Link to post
Share on other sites

How interesting that they discussed that and to ask if there was a way to avoid war? Freud di have some good ideas. I had never seen this before. I too have thought that if more women were in power the world would be better. Of course there are the exceptions such as Sarah Palin-she did being good humor though-and darn, the leader of Myanmar/Burma. I know it but it is getting mixed up in my head. She showed great promise but turned out to be awful. There are always the bad apples in the bunch.

I rant every day when I am signing when I write letters I have to control myself. Sometimes I need to take a break because I truly want to do body harm to these people. If you have done the Compassion meditation you will know last part about wishing happiness for every one and I can never get that part because I am just not mindful or compassionate enough to wish well for animal abusers/killers. Elephants are quite majestic but I love all of them. i would love to volunteer in a sanctuary. There is an elephant one in Tennessee. i appreciate you activism as well. The more the better.

I know what you mean about the weather. I spent 46 years in Boston and it is a bit warmer there plus it is the city so that makes for different temperatures. I too see people when it is 40-50 degrees wearing shorts occasionally and T-shirts. I am not that hardy but I did not grow up here. Then again I see people who on warmer days are wearing coats and hats when I am wearing a couple of  layers. Being surrounded by mountains with not a lot of buildings and roads the night temperatures go down quite a bit. It may be colder in Mn than it is here and I do not know if I could go someplace even colder. Every Feb. think of FL and that lasts for 5 seconds. I get tired of hot weather, I do not like air conditioning, and i do not like continuous heat and humidity. My parents lived there for a while and I was surprised that when my father died in August-years ago-it was quite pleasant there. I must have hit a good streak.

Vermont is lovely.

I have to sign my list of potions and share them now. I do it every day but I will never say I enjoy it.

How long have you been meditating an practicing mindfulness?

Share this post

Link to post
Share on other sites


Yes, I find both of those men quite fascinating. I agree, Palin did bring some good laughs but damn would that have been a disaster! I don't know about the Myanmar/Burma leader- need to educate myself more on world politics. You're right though, always bad apples in the bunch. 

Now I found out that George Floyd's killer knew him- they apparently worked at the same bar- and had "run-ins" there.  Wtf? I digress...

So proud of you for the work that you do. I hear you- not fun but somebody's gotta do it. I met with the founder of HumanizeMyHoodie yesterday to talk about more ways I can get involved directly. I want to bring mindfulness  and yoga  to the black community. What are your thoughts on that?

I'm not a fan of heat or air-conditioning either. Mountains would be lovely. I would prefer them to lakes. As an aside, once my husband and I were at some fancy restaurant with his colleagues and he ordered some lake fish (it may have been trout?) and the fish came on a plate like it just came from the water- eyes, fins, everything fully assembled, I couldn't look at it. Personally, I'm a vegetarian. I've never eaten steak in my life, that I can recall, something about it seems too much like eating flesh. 

I started practicing mindfulness when I got into yoga around 2012, but only got real about it in the last few years. I had to in order to stay sane. In the last few months I've been the most engaged in my practice, and I've noticed significant changes in my thoughts and mood. I'm far more patient (not one of my finest traits) and I'm able to let things go more easily. I am also finding it easier to feel compassion for myself and others. I think I shared it somewhere else here, but I learned that the very obstacles to compassion are actually our doorway to compassion. For example, I have a lot of anger toward my little sister, who is a severe alcoholic and hasn't been a part of my life. Underneath the anger is fear and hurt. Fear that she's gonna die soon and I'll lose her, and hurt because I want her in my life and she's disappointed me so many times. When I consider those things, I realize how much I love her, and I have a different perspective and realize that she's not choosing to drink and be miserable. She's got a terrible, progressive disease and is doing the best she can. She's not trying to hurt me- it's not about me. And I have no ability, no right, to dictate her life path. I'd do anything, though, to heal her. 

Have a lovely, peaceful day!

Share this post

Link to post
Share on other sites

A disaster for sure! I did love those Tina Fey sketches though. Aaun Sun Suu Kyi is the leader of Burma. Oddly in the beginning when they were fighting for freedom she was excellent but then she became the leader and turned bad. She has been responsible for the killings of the Rohingya people. 

I did not hear that George Floyd's killer knew him. I never did see the video to be honest but I have see the photo of that smug and repugnant cop kneeling on him. Digression happens all the time. Try living in my head sometimes.

We are both doing what we can and we strive to do more. I question myself all the time and check what I am thinking. We are not perfect but we are trying. I have gotten many resources to  listen to on line which make me think things I might not have considered before. There was an interview on Mindfulness with a black woman doing exactly that-mindfulness with black people. It is a great idea. I can look for it and send you her name.

You would like it here-we have mountains galore. It is not called the Green Mountain state for nothing. I love lakes and any kind of nature. Each has its own specialness but of course there are some parts we enjoy more. For example, I would love to visit the desert but probably would not want to live there. There is a good reason that steak looks like flesh-it was. I became vegetarian 44 years ago and knew nothing but later I learned and decided I needed to step up my game so I have been vegan since then. You have never eaten steak? Wow. Rachel has eaten one piece of bacon in her life when she was 3 because we had friends living with us who ate meat. I was not going to say no and luckily she did not like it. I was glad it was that and not chicken or some other food because bacon has a strong taste  and not one she might want again. Phew.

You are ahead of me. I find it a struggle and my mind is in conflict often because of my feelings about animals and the planet and what people do to them. I know there are many good and caring people but still I find it har. Also I have been like i am for so long it is harder to change. I am doing better though. That must be a weight off your shoulders to be able to understand your sister more. I know it is not the same but I used to get mad at Henry, my dog, sometimes not because I was mad at things he did but because I was worried for him. Alcoholism affects many though and sometimes one has to step away even if you love her. I wonder if you are mad at her as well because maybe it has affected your relationship with your mother or even just how it affects her.

I finally got off the chair and here I am back in it.  It is time to get up again. Really, computers are a blessing and a curse.

Have a wonderful day.

Share this post

Link to post
Share on other sites

Hello Faune,

Thought you'd like the picture. Yes, Tina Fey can make anything funny. Interesting about leader of Burma, I'll have to check that out. 

Yes, that is troubling that he knew him....please don't watch the video. I didn't watch all of it- had to turn away. I'm surprised they kept showing it because it is truly traumatizing, and I didn't see the whole thing, I guess it was a 17 year old girl who filmed it. I'd like to think that if I was witnessing that I'd have gone up to the cop, hands up, with a calm voice and said, "dude, please, look at me," made eye contact, and stopped that mother somehow. I'd like to think that. Or maybe I would have tackled him. I don't know. 

Yes, I would love to see that video if you have it. Don't worry if you don't . I have so much material to get through it's crazy. But I'm excited to do so.  

Mountains are my thing. They're so majestic. I'm not surprised you like all things nature. Deserts are cool too (well, not cool as in temperature.) My sister lived in a desert area in CA for awhile. It was lovely but that heat is killer. 

 Vegan is cool- I've thought about it. I drink almond milk and the only animal product would be eggs. I wouldn't miss it. I went on a weekend yoga retreat and the chef made all vegan food and I have never in my life eaten so well! Damn was that food good! And I sure don't regret never having steak- you're right- it was flesh! No different really from human flesh. That's funny your daughter tried bacon and didn't like it. I never liked that either!

It's not that I'm ahead of you...I don't look at it like that at all. I think we are all at the place we're supposed to be at right now. Someday I'll tell you other things about where I'm at and you'll see I"m not all that evolved😜 

You're very intuitive- some of the anger towards sis is about how she sucks up all of my parent's energy and time, and specifically my mom's. My mom is definitely her enabler, which is on her. My mom has also enabled my dad to stay drinking my whole life, and my dad's never worked either, so that' s a whole other deal. But with my sis, mom takes care of her, pays all her bills (including her apartment rent, but I get it because if my sis lived with my parents it would kill them both.) However, my mom also brings her to detox, and when sis is drunk, it is not pretty. She gets very sloppy, belligerent, etc. My mom's not in the best of health so I worry all the time. Another thing I work on letting go of. My mom also occasionally financially takes care of my older sister who lives in CA, even though her tool of a boyfriend makes plenty of money. 

A couple of things I laugh at (because you gotta laugh.) Once when my sister was at the hospital ER being checked because of her blood alcohol level, the doctor was doing a mental status exam and asked her to name the Presidents backwards. Sis hopped off the examining table in her gown, started walking backwards and saying, "Trump, Obama, Bush..." I mean, come on!

Another time, I called mom on her cell and she's like, I'm on my way to bring sis some money then I'm off to Al-Anon. Wtf?? 

Anyway, hoping you have a lovely day!


Share this post

Link to post
Share on other sites

I do love that photo. Thank you. Is that your practice? I am not sure what the correct term would be. I would love to hear more of what you do some time.

I would have gotten angry and probably not watched the whole thing. I would guess they showed it over and over because it needed to be seen by anyone and everyone. I have watched others but sometimes I have to stop because I feel so frustrated and angry.I did hear it was by a teen who is being lauded as a hero now. It is excellent that she got it on camera. I always wonder what I would do since you mention what you might have done there. It is so hard to tell. Would we have acted or been frozen in horror? Being Jewish (a cultural and historical atheist Jew) I have read so much about the Holocaust and the resistance and wonder if I would have had the chutzpah to be in the resistance. I do not look stereotypically Jewish-possible non-Jewish father?-and could have passed. I am a bit of a wimp really and I am not a good liar but who knows? I like your "look at me" tactic" though. 

I don't think  this is live. I am not good at posting links but here is the interview on mindfulness for black people. It is to be read and is not that long.


You would like it here then. It doesn't get terribly hot and it is chock full of mountains. The desert is not humid but when it is 110 degrees who cares?

There are replacements for everything including eggs. They do not taste the same in some respects although I have not had vegan omelets. I would like to try one sometimes. People think that vegans eat nuts and seeds and vegetables but as you know there is a wealth of vegan choices. I did live bacon but it does have a strong flavor. I used to joke that when she got older whether she ate meat or not would be her choice but that she should know I would shoe her horrid pictures. Fortunately she never questioned what I taught her and she falls of the wagon once in a while but is still vegan. What can I say? I encourage your possible move to being vegan. Many say we proselytize but for those who do it out of love for the animals and the planet those are our reasons.

Maybe i would just like to be further into being mindful because it is a challenge. My mind bounces around like a pinball machine and meditating is hard. I will keep it up though because to not do it is worse. I will be most interested in hearing your story sometime.

I am on the outside looking in so I see that. I am impressed that you are as you are because clearly your family is not terribly healthy even if you love them. I am sure it was/is not easy. Have you been to Al-Anon? 

Those are funny. I particularly like the second part where your mother gives her money, to buy booze I am guessing, and then goes to Al-Anon. One has to laugh or you go crazy. your mothers seems to still be trying to grasp what Al-Anon is about.

It is a rainy day here and I shall be in the house all day unless there is a break and I can get Frankie the mini wiener dog out for a bit. Have a great day and thanks for the laugh.


Share this post

Link to post
Share on other sites

And you are right-we all need someone to share with and I do not have that here or pretty much with people I know. 

Share this post

Link to post
Share on other sites

Glad you liked the pic. My first yoga teacher went to an Elephant sanctuary each year where they saved elephants who were in danger. She is so sweet. I learned so much from her. My favorite thing she said is, "work with the body of the day" and "speak your truth, even if your voice shakes." She also reminded us that the sides of our body are never the same, and each day our bodies show up differently, so to never have expectations. She taught me about the chakras and dieties. Ganesha is the elephant diety and she is fierce- the remover of obstacles (you know I need that- I have a Ganesha figurine in my office.) Here is an image of Ganesha:

Ganesha #Ganesha #Ganesh | Lord ganesha paintings, Ganesha pictures

I can explain all the strange features if you'd like. I hope you're not offended by the strangeness- it's all meaningful and positive. 

I'm fascinated that you're Jewish. I am so curious about other faiths, I'd love to hear more. I had a lot of clients who were of other faiths  and from different backgrounds and countries and learned so much. Speaking of my practice, I was actually in private practice on my own for 13 years. I specialized primarily in trauma, saw clients (mostly adults) with everything from anxiety to schizophrenia. I did a lot of specialized training in trauma. Unfortunately, something traumatic happened in my office on 8/2/19 and I had to close my practice permanently. That is the source of major, major stress right now- and legal issues. Barely hangin on some days. Anyway, I grew up Catholic and went to Catholic grade school, which came with a lot of baggage I still probably carry around. I chose not to get confirmed at 13 or whatever age. My parents couldn't really argue cause Dad never went to church. 

I hear you about vegan- and I don't blame you for encouraging it. I'm the same way about therapy, yoga, and mindfulness. Hey- if it works for me then I'm gonna sell it!

I also hear you about the mind being bouncing ball. I struggle too- sometimes meditation "works," sometimes it's frustrating, but I figure it's gotta be doing something. I know that I'm more patient and present. Thank you for the compliment- it's been (I am) a work in progress.  A lot of work. Yes, I've been to Al-Anon and actually my mom took us to Al-Ateen when we were very young. I've also been to ACOA or Adult Children of Alcoholics. That's really helpful. And, Codependents Anonymous, Women for Recovery, Eating Disorders Anonymous, Brene Brown support group...I think that's all for support groups. They are generally very helpful. I find it hard to stick to them. I also have belonged to some book clubs which I enjoy since I read so much. I went to one at a treatment center, even though I never went to treatment there and I'm not an alcoholic, but my friend went there and I just sort of came along. They never asked, so I never told. Oops! I figured I qualified with all the alcoholics in my family.

I know, right? I'm sure that's exactly what happened with the money my mom gave to sis. You gotta laugh sometimes at the crazy that happens in my family. Denial is such a demon. I can't really talk- I remember telling my husband before we got married that I would always be anorexic and if he couldn't accept it not to marry me. Well, he married me. Interestingly, as I got healthier he admitted that he worried that when I did recover I might leave him because I would be stronger and would realize I could do better than him. (I've trained him well to talk about his emotions and be vulnerable.) We had a good talk that night and he is very supportive. I've also trained him to 'play' my eating disorder voice. So, if I'm freaking out about having had eaten a piece of cake, he'll be like, "Obviously you're gonna gain 5 pounds. You really shouldn't have eaten that cake. You didn't deserve it." Then, I'll hear that and get pissed off and talk back: "shut up! I am not gonna gain any weight from one stinking piece of cake, and it tasted damn good, and I deserve to eat cake every day!" It works amazingly well! When my internal eating disorder voice is externalized, it's easy to hear the crazy in it and challenge it. 

I love that you have a weiner dog!! When I was young we had one, but after a week my parents took it back because my dad didn't want an indoor dog. Talk about heartbreak! We didn't talk to him for awhile. And my dad is actually really sweet and a great guy aside from his drinking and depression. I used to wish he was a jerk, it would be easier if I couldn't stand him. But that decision, to take away the puppy, is something we never got over. We ended up getting a miniature American Eskimo. Darling, sweet dog. We loved her so much!

Sending love and light- have a wonderful day!


Share this post

Link to post
Share on other sites

Thank you for the link to the article Faune. There were several things that struck me. First of all, the notion of sankofa which is reclaiming what was lost or left behind. Very relevant for Black people, especially right now. Below is a link to an excellent talk about post-traumatic slavery syndrome that explains the epigenetics of racism. It's fairly long but worth it. Also, the author talked about hollow compassion; when white people express compassion yet refuse to acknowledge their own internalized bias and privilege. That is so true! I work hard to educate myself and examine my beliefs so that I can be honest and live with integrity. When the author described her son being profiled, she mentioned that he was wearing a hoodie. I support a movement called HumanizeMyHoodie (shameless plug) https://www.humanizemyhoodie.com which is a Minneapolis based organization that sells and gives away awesome hoodies with their logo, and educated people, schools, and organizations all over the world about racism, threat perception, microaggresions, police brutality and profiling, prison inequities, etc. Recently they're been interviewed many times in the news and radio programs. If you have an itch for shopping (like I always do) check out their hoodies on their website. I went through their training and found it to be very helpful. The last hoodie I bought commemorated Tupac Shakur, who I absolutely loved (still do).  


Share this post

Link to post
Share on other sites

I know about Ganesha from various places  and I know someone who is Indian-I am never sure who to call 'friends"-who has Ganesha in his house. Ganesha looks as she is supposed to. I do ot know all the various traits you mention though. I have an online friend in India and I am sure she must have Ganesha in her house because we did online activism in the same group and one of hers was the elephant group. Sadly elephants suffer a lot there in some parts. Apparently they choose to not honor Ganesha.

I I like what your teacher said about speaking one's truth even if your voice shakes. it is something I try to do. I did have to laugh about the two sides of the body only because each side of my body (and I am sure she meant this is a different way)  has a different temperate zone. The left stays warm and the right gets cold so that I often wear something on my right hand or wrist to keep it warm. I sometimes think I am cold and then think no, it is just the right side. IT is quite annoying. No one can figure it out. I have gone to acupuncture and that does not work either.

Being an atheist I am obviously not religious but there are things I like about it and my birth mother was Jewish so I am too although i did not consider myself so for years even though my adoptive parents were also Jewish. They were country club Jews and at some point in time I realized it was not something to be proud of plus there was nothing deep in their Judaism and they were snobby and racist. When I learned my birth mother was Jewish i had to deal with that and one night went to a presentation on Jews and the Resistance and then thought this was something I could feel good about. I know many people who grew up Catholic and no longer practice and are lapsed Catholics. 

One does have to laugh to keep from going crazy. At least you did ot follow in their footsteps but took another path. Whew! I love the game you play with your husband. It is simple , efficient , and has a touch of humor to it. You have trained him well although I am sure that it is more a matter of learning on his part and mutual respect. I found your participation with your friend amusing too. They didn't ask so why rebuke their assumptions? Did you get anything out of it? I guess you had spent so much time with alcoholics they though you fit in.One thing I have always been grateful for is that I do not have an addictive personality or at least not for drugs, alcohol, or cigarettes. 

That must have been very hard having your dog taken away I hope s/he was Ok. I always worry about the safety of the animals before anything else. Huskies are definitely more outdoor oriented. I had one come into my life and I used to say his theme song was "Love the One You're With". He was very smart-too smart and a challenge.

I saw there is another message from you so i will see what that is. I have more petitions to sign as well. I get a  list every day and I was needing a break because I often end up depressed and/or angry. Somedays are easier/harder than others.

If you ever want to talk about what happened at work feel free and if not I must of course respect that. It sounds like it was quite difficult for you and I am sorry for that.

See you soon.

Share this post

Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.


  • This community is designed to be a welcoming space to enhance mindfulness inquiry and exploration. In this spirit, please share and respond mindfully and compassionately, cultivating continued respect, safety, and support for all.
  • Recent Posts

    • enhancing non-judgmental moment-to-moment awareness   Hi All!  Here is your weekly dose of "5 Mindful Musings", a brief list of what's helping me live a more mindful life. What Helps Me Be Kind To Myself Compassionate Body Scan Meditation. Kristin Neff guides this powerful meditation to bring kind, caring awareness to sensations in the body, even if it's uncomfortable in the moment. Very helpful for processing emotions, feeling a sense of ease, and also for falling asleep.  What I'm Reflecting On 6 Reasons Why Mindfulness Is A Superpower These remind me how I can choose how to relate to any kind of experience, to refrain from judgment, to be with what's uncomfortable, to remember to breathe, to widen or narrow my perspective, to balance doing with being, and remember what's most important.   7 Things To Try When Mindfulness Doesn't Work These remind me that mindfulness alone is not always enough. Humans are complex, so we need a wide range of modalities to heal, grow and thrive. What I Wish My Own Schoolteachers Had Access To Teaching Mindfulness To Empower Adolescents. This is a powerful guide to help school teachers master the essential competencies needed to successfully share mindfulness practices with teens and adolescents.  "Wise and revolutionary. These are skilled and caring teachers giving you the real deal. They show how to soothe, inspire, and awaken the teenage spirit." - Jack Kornfield, PhD, bestselling author of A Path with Heart What I'm Exploring 20 Best Mindfulness Meditation Podcasts of 2020. This list from the team at Positive Psychology includes many wonderful mindfulness podcasts I had never heard of. Worth a look.  A Quote That I Love "The only reason we don't open our hearts and minds to other people is that they trigger confusion in us that we don't feel brave enough or sane enough to deal with. To the degree that we look clearly and compassionately at ourselves, we feel confident and fearless about looking into someone else's eyes." - Pema Chodron *Subscribe to our YouTube Channel for exclusive free mindfulness trainings.   And, as always, please share your feedback in our Mindfulness Community Forums. Which musing above is your favorite? What do you want more or less of? Other suggestions? Just add a post to the forum and let me know!  Wishing you well,    Sean Fargo Founder, Mindfulness Exercises       P.S. Spring Washam will join Mindfulness Mastermind on August 27th at 12pm PST!   Spring Washam is a well-known meditation teacher, author and visionary leader based in California and Peru. She is the author of A Fierce Heart: Finding Strength, Courage and Wisdom in Any Moment.  Spring is considered a pioneer in bringing mindfulness-based healing practices to diverse communities. She is one of the founders and core teachers at the East Bay Meditation Center, located in downtown Oakland, CA. Spring received extensive training by Jack Kornfield, is a member of the teacher’s council at Spirit Rock Meditation Center in northern California, and has practiced and studied Buddhist philosophy in both the Theravada and Tibetan schools of Buddhism for the last 20 years.  Members of Mindfulness Mastermind can access details about the workshop and the video link inside the Member Dashboard.
    • This week's question asks: What are some of your personal beliefs that you want to bring greater mindfulness to? We all hold somewhere within us beliefs that do not serve us. Which of your own beliefs would you like to bring greater mindfulness to? When you become aware of limiting or negative beliefs within you, what do you 'do' with them?
    • Hello Athena! Wonderful to meet you here. I've never tried labyrinth walking but am intrigued! Do you have any tips or resource recommendations?
    • Hi Priyanka! Great recommendation. I love this breathing technique.
    • Hey Ali, I haven't read that book so can't recommend from my own experience, but the description sounds great and probably very aligned with what you are looking for. If you read it, I'd love to hear your thoughts and reflections on it. Your expression of feeling depressed because of where you could be is not uncommon; I've heard quite a few others share how down they feel do to so much time spent caught up in bad habits and addictions. I know it can be a difficult feeling to experience, but it is a huge win (even if it doesn't feel like it) that you now feel a renewed yearning to work through this. That takes strength and courage!
  • Recent Topics

  • Popular Contributors

  • Create New...

Important Information

We have placed cookies on your device to help make this website better. You can adjust your cookie settings, otherwise we'll assume you're okay to continue.