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Rick @ FinestCoaching

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Posts posted by Rick @ FinestCoaching

  1. Gillian,

    I read your Blog & was touched by it...somehow we need more a Community of Spirit; sometimes, I have had temporary ones, then, they seem to go away; even the temporary ones do not sustain themselves...our earth speeds as if we have to  catch up with it... 

    I joined your Meditation of "Letting-Go"; it was what I needed today, so thank you:)...Kristin Neff & Christopher Germer, say:

    Mindfulness says, ‘Feel your Suffering with spacious awareness’. Self-Compassion says, ‘Be kind to yourself when you suffer’”.

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  2. On 8/5/2021 at 2:09 AM, Gillian Sanger said:

    I came across a video this morning of Francis Weller talking about grief. I must say, it felt to come at the perfect time. I have been experiencing a lot of grief about the state of our collective and his explanation of the many gates of grief was affirmative for me.

    Below is the video (with discussion about the five gates starting at 3:03, though the whole thing is worth a watch). That said, I'll just quickly outline the five gates he mentions here. If you have thoughts or reflections on any of these, I would love to hear them:

    1. Grief that occurs when we lose something or someone that we love

    2. Grief that occurs when we lose some part of ourselves we've never known

    3. Grief related to the losses of the world, the sorrow of the world

    4. Grief for what we expected when we came into this world but did not receive

    5. Ancestral grief

    He notes that in our modern societies, we tend only to really acknowledge the first type. Just hearing him talk about the additional gates of grief felt deeply validating.



    I just spotted this post from August-so much to respond to here; this Video is every enlightening; as I am grieving the loss of my Brother this past week, I grieve for the loss of my whole, Family cause I am the Sole survivor of my immediate Family; I also grieve for the loss of my Youth, cause I can no longer Run, as I use to run 10K races in my Youth.

    Francis recovery so much, I seem to be a loss for words, except, when I called a Colleague RN I use to work with, hearing the News about my Brother, I called her immeditately hoping she would provide some comfort, & Nada...she never returned my call...so that too was a loss; just to be able to express my Grief and acknowledged would have been somewhat calming.

    The fact our Planet is so rapidly changing; it's like the Soul of our earth is being ripped out from underneath us very unexpectantly too....to hear about "the hygiene of the Soul" is great way to put it. Jon Kabatt-Zinn speaks about taking care of our "Brain Health".

    As a practicing Catholic, we have the Traditions, i.e. "Rituals" of Practice I get to experience; I participated in 2 Mens' Retreats where any Topic/Feelings were expressed; that became deeper for me...so I had those positive experience...this deserves to be viewed again, over & over to remind us of who we are on so many levels.

    Thank you, Gillian for sharing.

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  3. Hi...I dont know what name to address you, "Braveheart..."

    I have never heard of a Personal Trainer having LCSW after his or her name, though anything is possible.

    Anyone who has LCSW= Licensed "Certified" Social Worker...hope that helps...in respect of other disciplines, I have met some qualified,  Ph.D. Therapists too (Doctor of Philosophy).

    Have a Great day,


  4. I would also agree with Gillian regarding other "Modalities" for your Anxiety & Depression, particularly Counseling with a Licensed Certified Counselor or Psychotherapist; since I have been on both receiving & treating end, I would lean toward a LCSW, Licensed Clinical Social Worker, however, that is an individual choice. That was my preference since I was an LCSW and been in Therapy with an LCSW. 

    Any Physical activity was always an adjunct along with Therapy for me; Running was my forte. Wish I could do now, since age is creeping in:(.

  5. On 10/9/2021 at 10:57 PM, simoneturner said:

    Would love to hear about how to infuse mindfulness exercises in regards to moving frozen tension on the body. Is that possible through mindfulness medi's?

    Now I would approach this a couple of ways:

    First, based on the definition of Mindfulness, the present focus is to be aware of the "frozen tension"; now it seems "moving frozen tension" sounds like an Oxymoron, so if tension is Frozen, how can it be moving, hypothetically.

    In any case, Awareness in the body is primary; now given, it may be, or experienced as "moving", I would be inviting a possible softening of that tension as it moves, and ask how that feels & sensing in the body, then inviting a focusing on the breath and an anchoring of the feet on the ground and sensing how that feels...

    So what do y'all think of my suggestions?

  6. Some Key Topics are Compassion & Self-Compassion via Loving Kindness; also a Great Topic is David Treleaven's Book, Trauma-Sensitive Mindfulness; there is so much to learn in that book; in-fact, that's why I began the TSM Book Club; hope folks join & contribute...

    I have spent some time on www.Mindful.org and happened to win Tara Brach's book, "Trusting the Gold"; it's Awesome to read about her history...lots of gems in her book!

    By nearly finishing David's Book, I have learnt so much about how to be aware of & be curious RE: Trauma and how to assist Clients who Meditate as a helpful resource...especially how to Screen Clients for Trauma (Pgs. 161 + 162). That's a hot topic in of itself! It's a definite Must Read in my humble opinion.

  7. Hey Stephen,

    Welcome aboard! My name is Rick; see our Free Website: you can find hundreds if not thousands of Meditations! That should get you off to a Great start!

    Again, Welcome aboard:)






  8. I'll start with my own made up quotes, though I just found a Looseleaf of 10 pages of valuable quotes; anyway, here's mine:

         "If you are emotionally stuck in the past with those stories, then your Amygdala has already been Hi-Jacked".

                                                            ~~~Rick Barber~~~~ "My intention today is, I will Focus on the Present".



  9. Hi Abby, 

    First of all, there's no competition here, thoughts included, i.e. no Winning or Losing here; whatever your feelings are, positive, negative, or even neutral; they just are. Is it easy, no, yet anything worthwhile is worth struggling for. 

    Here's my suggestion: Start with an Intention & pick a Meditation theme personal for you & Meditate on that; remember, there is no goal or mission to achieve or to remove thoughts or feelings,  just be present with whatever is befronting you. 

     And always remember here, YANA-You are not alone:) as the Meditation, "Just Like Me" says....I, too have struggles, rambling thoughts, worries, etc.  So in essence, you are, "Just Like Me". 🙂

    Also, I learnt a long time ago in another program, that to rationalize, is to tell yourself, rational Lies. Sounds a bit toughlove-ish; food for thought. And before you end your Meditation, try offering yourself some Loving-Kindness, ok?

    Have you given any thought to Gillian's suggestions to you from another post? 

    Amy, May You Be Well/May You Be Free from Suffering/May You Be Healthy/May You Be Happy/May You Live with Ease.


    • Thanks 1
  10. A Different Perspective:

    In marketing Mindfulness programs in Texas, I am informed by another Certificate holder here, that using the Term, Mindfulness, apparently is a turn off locally.  So in presenting a Mindfulness Proposal to a local Fire Dept. I decided to call my Program, an IFA, to give it a catchy anacronym,  an Intentional Focused Awareness program instead; it's not really lying, cause the Focused Awareness would still be defined the same definition, + the exercise part of the program would result in Mindful Meditation-i just decided to approach it from a different angle, so in essence, Same, yet Different:)

    Your thoughts?


  11. Hi Jane,

    What a Beautiful Photo & Program you offer! I have a Cousin who lives in Belfast, ME and he crews the Maine State Ferry Service everyday. If you ever run up that way, I'll share who he is. He is a simple Gent to talk to. Seeing your poster gave me an idea for one! So thank you for that!

    Given our Covid state of affairs & having a Live Outdoor Mindful Meditation Group, this is what my Fiancée are doing

    RE: Social Distancing: I purchased these at Walmart for a measly $9.99>>Easy to pack into a Backpack, so just a suggestion.

    The benefits of having it in this public Park, it provides appealing Nature noises, and the huge tree adjacent to us provides great shade if the weather is warm, which usually at 9AM is not...morning temps are now running in the 70's.


  12. Hi Abby,

    Is Mindful Meditation is for everyone? No, it is for all who want it. Learning the Positive outcomes of it will illustrate over time; it is not a Cure-all either. When appropriate, it could also be utilized as an adjunct to Therapy as well; based on my experience as a former Clinical Therapist. In another post to you I recommended the following link to Tara Brach:


    • Like 2
    • Thanks 1
  13. Hi Abby,

    For one thing, all of us do not live in. this site; also, Gillian is our Moderator, and she is in Sweden, so that puts her 7 Hours ahead of me, so the time there is 6:12PM Sweden time....so that's why you don't hear from her. And I have no idea where you are.

    Now to assist you, I'm not sure what your question is. 

    As far as what makes one happy, is an individual preference; there are many options to what makes one "happy" as you say. To be certain, would you benefit 1 hour per day in 6 mos? Sure...it is not perfection, would you still have Stress in your life? Yes, for sure...would you build Resilience over time? Assuming you obtain the skills to benefit, that depends on your Learning skills...This is not a perfect response, yet the best I can offer you; hope that helps...This isnt a beginning/end all; hopefully, Mindful Meditation, you will continue to build for life and not just in 6 months. 

    My name is Rick & I emplore you some patience when expecting immediate results. We all have very busy lives.


    FYI---Tara Brach has some wonderful Meditations @:


    I wish you Well.

    • Like 2
  14. Hi Narmadha,

    Thanks for sharing; in my opinion, we have the ability to influence folks everyday with a Mindful attitude; in today's Meditation Group, there was a woman in my Class in pain prior to the group; the pain she showed up this morning was not quite the same paIn as she left; her attitude at least for those moments, & slightly, after our group Positive for her; she realized that her pain had diminished, not gone away though will help her to understand some of the nature of her pain, and maybe, just maybe, she can soften some of the pain, day by day...Time will tell!

    Now, I cannot speak the Drawing or Dancing classes, yet being a Creative Photographer, I can create one single image in one single moment & be curious about it & having no judgement about it.:)

    See my attached Photo-now one may judge this as a dumb tattered leaf, yet for me, I was focused in the present moment having lots of curiosity & No judgement, and yet was able to manipulate it just a little Artistically, to appreciate it's Natural Beauty in the moment:), in my humble opinion. Catch my drift??? Hope that helps:)




    • Like 2
  15. Welcome, Narmadha,

    Hope you gain many benefits from being here; let us know how we can help you; Gillian is our Moderator; she is very Supportive of us and is quite Resouceful.

    Again, Welcome; I am Rick in McKinney, TX.

    • Like 1
  16. Hi Friends, 

    Feel free to join us today, wherever you are:

    Sunday Zoom Mindful Meditation today-see these details:

    Rick Barber is inviting you to a scheduled Zoom meeting.

    Topic: A Mindful Meditation Just For You-Opening to a Mindful Pause.

    Time: Aug 15, 2021 04:00 PM Central Time (US and Canada)

    Join Zoom Meeting:


    Meeting ID: 975 877 1879

    Passcode: Mindful

    So come join us! Let's Mindfully Practice together!

    • Like 1
  17. Hello, I can’t tell what your name is! So what do we call you, please. 
    Welcome to our Group! Gillian is our Group Monitor here! 
    If you go to this link; you will find many Resources:


    Hope that helps; let us know whom you are & how we can be helpful; it is evening now probably where Gillian is, and being Sunday, she may not be available.

    Again, welcome & you are amongst Friends:)

    My name is Rick in McKinney, TX. US OF A.

    • Like 2
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