Everything posted by Mary Sweeney
The colour of the autumn leaves. I sat gazing out the window yesterday, just noticing how many shades and colours I could identify. It was raining, but if anything, that caused the colours to appear brighter and even more colourful against a grey sky. I was so relaxed it nearly seemed like a form of meditation. I hope you are all well and find something to enjoy daily.
I lost my father 12 years ago from motor neuron disease. Just a month after his death. We found out my twin sister had a brain tumour. It was malignant and at a stage 4 when diagnosed. I was heartbroken. She was living in England and I in Ireland, but I went to see her as often as I could. A year after her diagnosis, she died. And so did a part of me. I still find it hard, that I can not remember her funeral and so much that went on even before she died. They diagnosed me with complicated grief, and I was seeing a psychologist.It was probably the best thing I could have done. I slowly understood that I needed my own self compassion. I had to be a friend to myself and say comforting things such as." I know you are hurting. It's okay, sweetheart; you need not feel guilty for being alive. This was out of your control. You did what you could, and you need not feel shame for not remembering everything. I meditated deeply and heard Joan, my twin's voice saying," this will be okay. I will take care of you. I am here. I slowly came to terms with my loss. I will always miss her, but I feel I can get in touch anytime I want to. I wrote poems and songs for her. And that helps to keep her memory alive.
I live in Ireland, and I am a Creative Kids Mindfulness Practitioner. I have only just qualified and running my first sessions. I am enjoying them as much as the children. I am also certified in Mindfulness Based CBT. I have practised mindfulness for many years. At the moment I am recovering from bacterial meningitis. I was in a coma for a week and was lucky to survive. I was in hospital for a month. That was four months ago. It was a very traumatic time. I also have fibromyalgia and rheumatoid arthritis, and so I practice mindfulness now more than ever. I have managed to cut down on a lot of pain meds from a large amount, and that is all down to mindfulness. I am now doing a full mindfulness teacher training course. It will take me a while, but I know I will get there. I am a singer, songwriter and a music therapist. I retired from that after being diagnosed with Ulcerative Colitis, but I probably had a much longer career than a lot of people involved in music, so I am very grateful. I'm not very lucky when it comes to health, but I am coping and managing well. I meditate at least 3 times a day and do several informal practices during the day. I am looking forward to being a member here and meeting you all.
Hello Mary! I am just seeing this status update now. For some reason status updates don't show up under 'Unread Content'.
It sounds like these past few months and all you've been through prior to that has been quite challenging! It is wonderful to hear about how much mindfulness has helped you in dealing with pain. That is something I am less knowledgable about. There is a thread on mindfulness & pain. If you'd like to share any insights, I'd love to hear about what has worked for you.
It is really lovely to have you hear. I look forward to more discussions!