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Ali Zien

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Everything posted by Ali Zien

  1. Hello, I am so sorry for my long absence but I was going with cycles of high ecstasy and low suicidal depression . I would love to seek your wisdom on how to be mindful and present with unpleasant experiences that leads to relapsing to addiction, often when I experience boredom and emotional resistance or urges I would relapse back into toxic negative addictions, and I am sorry if this is inappropriate but for 10 years I've been addicted to adult movies and binge eating... for the last 5 years I've been trying to quit but there is a pattern that repeats every 5 ~ 10 days I would relapse again. I want to make a breakthrough in my life because there is amazing miracles happening right now but the pattern of relapsing is like a chain keeping me in mud.
  2. la (no) ilaha (God) illa (but) allah (Allah) I understand it's little bit hard to say that because you can't speak arabic.. Arabic is a very heavy language not hard but heavy.
  3. if you are interested to learn more:
  4. I am not really great at formatting topics in English but I hope this one does good. In Islam we have a term "Zikr" (Dhikr) in a sentence "Zikr Allah" which translates to remembrance of Allah (Allah is the arabic word of God, so put any mental labels away). Usually it was taught to be repeated throughout the day as it will bring you closer to God, but no one ever mentioned it as a way of being mindful... it was just a plain words we repeated for hours without any attention. before bed and after prayer (Salah) we would repeat 33 each: سبحان الله ( Glorified be Allah ) الحمدلله ( Praise be to Allah ) الله أكبر ( Allah is the greatest ) beside that, Islam literally means to surrender and the purpose of Islam is to surrender to the divine and to be one. so one thing I did learn from a Sufi scholar that whenever you feel stress or fear repeat (لا اله الا الله : There is no God but Allah ) to remind yourself that you worship Allah not life and you don't worship situations or circumstances and nothing can control your life but Allah. When prophet Muhammad came he destroyed the idols that was been worshiped in Mecca because this is the purpose of Islam as I've mentioned before, not to worship external nor internal mental idols but to worship the ultimate source of love and peace, to surrender to his will and not let anything beside him to stress or worry you. Allah says in the Quran: (Verily in the remembrance of Allah do hearts find rest)[Ar-Ra'd: 28]. I just had this insight and I thought it would be nice to share it with you ^_^
  5. I did describe this "not going my way" in a very self-humbling way "This movie has been in make for 15 billion years...who are you to demand how it should look like "... not to be rough to myself but to remind myself to be "living" and to enjoy the movie with presence and gratitude to the maker of it ^_^ I just had a similar experience but I wouldn't label it as frustration instead resistance, but I remember you telling me "It's okay be here" and I kept telling myself the same and reminding myself that it's not me thinking I am just observing. was little bit challenging to act righteously but thankfully the mind did settle after a while
  6. I wonder what is the origin of frustration ? is it fear of uncertainty ? Mostly I would experience frustration when I am studying or programming, which makes me little bit peeved because the mental image it creates of "dead end" or big wall you can't cross. feeling lost or not knowing what to do, can't understand a topic..etc I've journaled about it yesterday and by far I guess it has 2 reasons: 1- expectations for future, When you are not living life but rather wants to govern how things should look like in order for you to be happy then you deserve to suffer, telling the author how the movie should look like ? This movie has been in make for 15 billion years...who are you to demand how it should look like (This is me talking to myself in the journal, not offending anyone ^_^ ).. so for example, I expect to understand the topic from first or two tries. 2- The ego needs for perfection, denying it's ignorance and it is frustrated because the process of learning exposes this truth of how fragile and ignorant. what do you think would end frustration ? or to ease it and accept it as part of the learning process ?
  7. So sorry for very late reply ^_^ I just had an intuition to open this article and my eyes fell on your comment again and it did ring a bell, yesterday I was reading The power of now by Eckhart tolle... just quick 1 page read haha and he was talking about bringing awareness to the body and how the body rejoices when you give it attention (reminds me of a little child hahaha) then he approached emotions like depression,fear or any form of "Negativity.. "if it does enter your field you don't need to offer any resistance because it passes right through you".
  8. Welcome to the family ^_^
  9. first of all it was gratitude journal, but I wasn't able to cultivate any power to it anymore. then I've discovered Morning power questions by Tony Robbins, they are easy to do anywhere. What are you grateful for ? what are you happy about ? what are you committed to ? what are you excited for ? what are you enjoying most in your life ? who do you love ? who loves you ?
  10. (I am sorry if this isn't the right section, I am new here) despite how simple this question, yet it's truly powerful. few moments ago something really eye-opening did happen to me, so I was on facebook making a post using my father's phone and by a mistake I almost shared a photo of him... the thing is that my father is 63 and he had a stroke 3 years ago, he is not ugly but he is simple person. so what happened is I felt a strong feeling of wanting to cry and confused feelings of guilt, shame and fear that if I did post it by a mistake that someone might make fun of him or even use it as a meme.. (if you couldn't relate to this part, it's just something very sensitive to me) after few seconds I started to process my emotions and I asked myself "Are you here ?" this was such a relief, I've been observing the patterns of suffering my mind creates. few days ago I was little bit frustrated and suddenly I just had those quick fleeting thoughts of quiting diet,binge eating and relapsing back to addiction... Thankfully that I've been meditating a lot lately that I've developed the skill of observing that I was able to "step out" and break the pattern. I wonder why would God create something like that ? and I also wonder sometimes is there a chance to be present all the time ? a stage where I can live without this tormentor making life seems gray and unbearable.
  11. I feel very special and gifted to see such a heart warming comments. Thank you so much ♥
  12. Hello ,may peace and Allah's blessings be upon you السلام عليكم ورحمة الله وبركاته . I am 21 from Egypt, I practice boxing and I study sociology at university, working as a front-end web developer. I love cats ^_^, I own 7 cats and ironically I was googling once and found an image of a cat that looks exactly like me ( I attached the image ) I am truly interested in meditation and philosophy, got really curious about it when I read the power of now by Eckhart Tolle.. in this month (Ramadan) I tried to stay away from active life and to focus on meditating,praying,reading,writing.. I want to sharpen my mind to stay present. I've been meditating consistently through this year daily for more than 20 mins (sometimes I would do 1 hour daily and sometimes I wouldn't meditate at all) I understand that mindfulness is like boxing, there is no certain level where you are going to be perfect and present 100% all the time.. it takes practice. my motivation for meditating is to calm my mind and to be able to concentrate on praying ( Islamic meditation ) and to find joy of creation instead of the attachment to the result or "Getting shit done". I seek mastery and excellence in the process. I am always curious to learn about mindfulness, so I hope that you might accept my childish curiosity and incessant questions
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